Quote for August 22, 2014

The joy of remembering our wedding day 27 years ago and the life we’ve made together.

Quote for August 21, 2014


Fun times at one of our favorite breakfast spots- the 59 Diner

Quote for August 18th, 2014

Joy with my husband Paul and I finishing our first bike trail together- the Apple Capital City Trail in Wenatchee WA!

My Happiness Project- An Update


My Happiness Project- An Update

It’s been eight months since I posted My Happiness Project. So how’s it going?, some of you might be interested to know. Are you happy? Yes, most of the time. Did you stick with all 12 commandments? I’d have to say I try to most of the time and if I don’t and for very long, it’s usually the source of why I’m becoming unhappy.

Here’s a quick review. It started after a paradox of sorts. I’d just returned from paradise, a Bahamian Cruise and was unhappy. I decided to read Gretchen Ruben’s The Happiness Project and discover what she might have to say about it.  I quickly learned she had many wise comments and thought provoking questions, one of which was “Is this all there is?” to which I answered “yup, but I should be content, but what was getting in the way of me enjoying my own life.” The answer was MYSELF.  You see, we know what we should be doing, but what keeps us from doing the things we know are good for us? Gretchen Ruben had a powerful suggestion. Come up with 12 commandments for yourself, 12 things that speak to you and make you happy. Sounds easy? At first it does, but you need to actually take the time and listen to yourself and what is important to you, not your neighbor, your boss, kids, husband, best friend but YOU.  Have you done that lately? It’s important.  What I discovered that I was running around being too busy to really listen to me, but when I took the time I came up with the following list.

Kathy’s List

1. Prayer and meditation daily- make this a top priority to set my day on the right course.

2. Resist negative self- thought- the above helps with feeling badly about myself, encourages positive thoughts, positive actions and pretty soon you are on a positive cycle rather than a negative one.

3.  Don’t compare- Be Kathy, you can’t be someone you are not, embrace who you are while trying to improve.

4. Seek affirmation from yourself not others- Please yourself, don’t do things for other’s approval because it won’t always happen.  You can’t please everyone.

5. Exercise daily- Even if it’s walking the dog. Exercise gives you more energy and a positive outlook.

6. Be kind- When in doubt choose to be nice, even if something is true it doesn’t mean it is kind or should be said.

7. Be patient- With myself and others, don’t give up and keep on trying.

8. Have fun- Be silly and do something just because, at least once everyday. Laugh, tell a joke or make someone else laugh.  Laughter is healing.

9. Organize- De-clutter, mess is stress.

10. Be generous- With my time, abilities and resources, don’t keep score and give without expecting anything in return.

I realized I had only made 10 commandments so I added :

11. Add some music to your day

12. Keep a gratitude journal each day and include not only these daily goals but list some long term goals

I have to say that the first commandment helps me set the right course for the rest of my commandments, it put me in the proper frame of mind and kept me focused. I’ve begun to add meditation to my routine, it’s very good but I’ve discovered how stiff I am. Hopefully the stretching will help. The second commandment is truly important. I used to focus on my actions but it’s what you think about and your cognitive life that can truly interfere with your happiness. Fill your mind with affirmation and positive thoughts and your actions will follow!  I think one of the most influential of the commandments was to stop comparing myself to other people. When I confessed this to some of my friends, they also told me that they had compared themselves to me. How can you be two people? Embrace your strengths, work on them and try to encourage yourself to be your very best self.  Support those areas that need growth, otherwise be realistic and kind to yourself. The energy that is wasted in comparison can be put to such better use, like say truly investing what you’d like to do with your time.

I took that time to reflect on what I wanted to do with the next years in my life after raising my children and discovered that I wanted to return to graduate school to become a couples and family therapist. I also wanted to self-publish my caregivers book. These are goals that I set and worked to achieve not for someone else but to see how I could best use my abilities to help others.

I also found it was important to share affirming thoughts with others so I try to say something kind to someone each day and not try to get a compliment in return or keep score. Is this always easy? No, but it’s important to share and give to others just because and to be kind just because It’s also important to take time to have a little fun every day. There’s not always time to go out but you can share a laugh, make a joke or just be silly. Joy and laughter are important. While on our cruise, music played nearly all day long and I realized I missed that. I made sure  music played  in my car and in the house. Remember when we were teenagers? We always had the radio on, or were listening to the latest music. What happened? I also realized I used to play the guitar from age 10-18. I decided to brush the dust of it and start playing again, just for fun.
Exercise is good for you!  We all know that. Sometimes it just becomes another chore or way to keep the pounds off. But it should be another joy and something that’s just part of your day.  If I don’t exercise, I miss it terribly! For our 50th birthday gift to one another, Paul and I bought a set of road bikes so we would start cycling together. It’s been fun!
I try to be generous, I guess I wish I could be more. I became a Board Member of the Northwest Sarcoma Foundation this March and hope to donate a portion of my book sales back to the foundation. I do my best to fundraise for the foundation which helps families in financial need during cancer treatment and gives money to life saving research.
As far as de-cluttering, we moved back to our home in Everett this June. If you ever wish to de-clutter and organize, I suggest moving is the best time to attempt that chore. Aside from the stress of moving, you have no better opportunity to go through each and every item you own and assess whether you wish to keep it bubble wrap it, pack it or toss it in the trash or give it to Goodwill.  It’s been and invaluable lesson in learning that less can indeed be more especially if you have to pack it with you!!
I haven’t kept a chart on my commandments after the first few months but I think I will begin again this September, it’s been fun to list each of the items that are completed each day or try to do better if this day wasn’t as good as the last one.

It’s been a good project, I’d recommend it to anyone!  Make it your own and have fun!!



Quote for August14, 2014

Joy is seeing a spot of color on a gray day

Quote for August 12, 2014

Joy is having Gelato with a good friend on a hot summer day

Quote for August 11, 2014

And there are days when we need to choose Joy…

Stuffed Mushrooms


Stuffed Mushrooms-

Here’s a family favorites passed down to me from my Nonna. My son Conner was heading off to college and I decided to make a plate of these for him. They are his favorite and why not? With only 4 ingredients they are so easy!!


24 large mushrooms cored

1 cup shredded mozzarella cheese

1/2 pound spicy Italian sausage

1/4 cup Salsa

2 Tablespoons of Olive Oil

Fry the sausage and rain, combine the cheese and salsa and chopped the mushroom stems. Fill the mushrooms with a spoonful of the mixture after brushing with olive oil. Place the mushrooms in a greased 9×13 in pan using the remainder of the olive oil. Bake for 20-25 minutes at 350 degrees. Allow to cool for 5 minutes.

Quote for August 8th, 2014

“We didn’t realize we were making memories, we just knew we were having fun.”- anonymous

Quote for August 7th, 2014

“People rarely succeed unless they have fun in what they are doing,” Dale Carnegie

Do you enjoy what you do?